Hair Stories!
Aliya S. King is a freelance journalist, which might explain her witty, informal yet informative, completely captivating writing style. She also is a fellow freckleface, which might explain my total giddiness about her gorgeousity, generously shared with us via photos of her hair as it transforms through the years. If you are traveling your own hair journey and/or just enjoy reading about others’ hair journeys, i highly recommend reading her recent piece, TWA – the only way to fly!
Want more? My sister recently shared with me an audio feature in the New York Times where nine women discuss their hairstyles and their reasons for wearing their hair the way they do. Tresses Of Choice. The multimedia element is linked to an article about black hair and its political tendrils, which coil their way (heh) into almost every facet of black feminine culture. We never seem to tire of talking about it, and with Chris Rock’s movie Good Hair coming out next month, the topic seems to be on everyone’s lips.
What’s YOUR hair story? 
)
4 Comment to “Hair Stories!”
I wrote a whole post about “good hair” and how it’s affected me in my blog about a week or 2 ago. Remember, you said you wanted a story lol. Here’s most of it:
The main thing that separates my hair from your typical Black person’s is that it’s never been permed (in Black culture, “to perm” = “to relax”/permanently straighten). My mom was determined to never relax it as a child and I continued into adulthood.
It wasn’t easy to not have relaxed hair. Not only is natural hair more difficult to deal with, but there’s societal pressure to get relaxed hair. When I was 7 – 8 or so, when my classmates were getting their first perms, my aunts, uncles, and grandparents kept pestering my parents to relax my hair. And frankly, since my classmates’ hair looked so nice, I pestered them too. My mom would just tell me that I was too young to get a perm and left it at that. “Too young” means nothing to a child when their peers are allowed to do it, so I was frustrated.
As I got older, around 6th grade, I understood the value in having virgin hair. How much “healthier” it was. Not to brag, but almost no one my age and race had hair as long, thick and…well, as naturally nice as mine was. I greatly valued my hair.
As long as it was straight.
I became very vain with regards to my hair. Water was the enemy. Rain, fog, sprinklers, etc. It’s a common enemy to the Black female. You wanna know why most Black women can’t swim? Because they don’t want to get their hair wet. When the swimming unit came up in high school, only 2 Black women were in the advanced class. The other 15 or so of us were beginners and spent most of class wading around as to not get our hair wet.
Anyway, my long, thick straight hair was my crown. I didn’t want to wear it natural. I didn’t even *know* how it looked completely natural and dry. I was so used to blow drying and straightening it right away to achieve my “Baywatch hair,” as a girl called it.
I never even did my own hair until college. Before then, I knew my hair was my best asset. My only asset. It was really the only attractive thing about me. I had beautiful skin, but an ugly face. I really should have spent more time before college getting acquainted with it and trying to figure out the best way to approach. Washing and styling a Black head is like a job. It’s not like your typical White head where it’s just a part of your day, like showering and brushing your teeth. Black women have to plan their hair into their week. I didn’t want to leave my only good asset to myself and my own doings.
I wore my hair naturally *intentionally* for the first time in my 20s. I still struggle with it. Honestly, I just don’t know how to really style it. I don’t know how to maximize its curl texture to prevent it from look “nappy,” “frizzy,” “poofy,” all the things “good hair” isn’t. I have what us Black people call a “kitchen.” It’s the hair at the nape of your neck that’s short and looks like a Brillo pad naturally. I hate it. I can’t not touch it when it’s natural because I don’t want it to dred up, but then it breaks and won’t grow. I want to wear it natural more often, but I can’t because I have a real job. I need someone to teach me, but it’s difficult because I’d have to find someone who knows how to deal with someone with as much hair as I have.
I do my own hair nowadays. I haven’t been to the salon in about 2 years. It’s a necessary evil. It takes me about 4 hours, at least, to do and it never looks anywhere near as nice as the salon. By nice I mean straight. It’s frustrating. I could just go to the salon, but that’s about $65 (cost 2 years ago). Just to get it straight. Forget about if I want a curl or wave in my hair or an actual style in my hair.
It’s an ongoing learning process. A process to learn the best products to use. To learn the best techniques to execute. To learn that no matter what happens, I am still beautiful.
FYI, most of my readers are White, hence my breaking down a few things in my entry.
Lived this, all day, everyday. I wanted to swim, I swam. I still have that faint voice that says you’d look better if you’d straighten your hair and then I shake my head and say right up until you fall asleep anywhere and that would be the end – the beginning of tied up hair.
Yes, ah Yes, the salon – the best was the Chinese where they put a conditioner on and blew it dry OMG i woke up the same as when I fell asleep- they closed, however they gave me hope. NOPE – no way could I recreate that magic. So, back to the salon – no chemicals just heat and lots of it. Then, she talked me into chemicals – we no longer see each other as it has taken 3 years to recoup half of what I had. (I love telling this story of the pain – the whole subject)
Back to the natural (never related to the word Afro – that speaks of a comb stuck in the top of your head and weed in your breast pocket) I loved my natural, best picture I ever took. Still, when I’m home alone I let her out and smile at her profile and let the feel of her freedom wash over me. Nuff You get that I get it, right?
Hi just wanted to say that I love the new site. It gives evyorene a bit of an insight into all of the staff, and for anyone who has never been before it will make it seem like they are already part of the family if they watch this before they come in. Love the staff and atmosphere always happy, friendly and even a bit mad sometimes.